Version #4: English dialog [Switch language/version)]
仙流物語 — Senru Monogatari
(Part 3)
Two weeks has passed and Rukawa hasn't received a single phone call from Sendou. He doesn't seem to care as he knows how to busy himself with basketball and sleep, but inside, he's pissed off. It was right after that day when they went out for a stroll that Sendou stopped calling him.
He still clearly remembers what happened. He still remembers what Sendou almost did but which he didn’t. Why did he do that? Why did he end up not doing it? What is he thinking after all? And worse, what is Rukawa thinking?
Rukawa is annoyed. He finds it frustrating that something this insignificant is bothering him at all. No, it’s not about the fact that Sendou no longer calls him. It’s the fact he’s bothered by the fact that Sendou no longer calls him. It’s confusing. He doesn’t get it. And he hates it.
After those two weeks, he stops bringing his cell phone and leaves it at home turned off, in case it rings. He's got a lot to catch up on basketball if he intends to be 'Japan's number one high schooler' (let alone MJ junior), and he needs to gives it a hundred percent focus. He now starts playing even more aggressively, often challenging the senior regulars, surprising them with every move and turn. Most of them assume that Rukawa's just excited about the nationals, but Sakuragi sure has a different idea.
Sakuragi: I don’t think that’s what it is.
Mitsui & Miyagi: What?
Sakuragi: I mean, if you think about it that stupid fox hasn’t been looking at his phone recently, right?
Miyagi: Now that you mention it…
Sakuragi: And the only person who’d ever call someone like him is “him”, right?
Mitsui: Ooh, now we’re talking.
Sakuragi: That means… hehehe… Those two must be having a fight!
Mitsui: Ooh! Pretty impressive, Sakuragi!
Miyagi: You’re more observant than I <ever> thought, Hanamichi.
Sakuragi: Of course! I’m a genius after all! Nyaahahahaha!
Mitsui: But hey, what’s that got to do with Rukawa’s aggressive play these days?
Ayako joins in the conversation: Maybe he’s venting his frustration on basketball?
Miyagi: Oh! Good one, Aya chan!
Sakuragi stares at Ayako, displaying possessiveness over Miyagi. Ayako simply smiles at him.
Ayako: Isn’t that right? Genius.
That pretty much makes Sakuragi smile for the rest of the day.
----------------------------
A few days later, Sendou comes by Shohoku after school. He goes to the gym to check the team out and finds Miyagi leaning against the wall near the door. Miyagi notices Sendou and greets him.
Miyagi: Oh, Sendou.
Sendou: Hey.
Everyone turns around to see Sendou by the door when they hear his name, and Sendou simply nods and waves back at them.
Miyagi: You looking for Rukawa?
Sendou: Uh, yeah.
Miyagi: That’s too bad. He left immediately after practice. That was like what… 15 minutes ago?
Sendou: Oh, he did?
At that moment, Sakuragi comes out of the changing room and sees Sendou.
Sakuragi: Ooh Sendou!!
Miyagi puts a hand to his forehead and shakes his head, sighing.
Miyagi: Not again…
Sakuragi walks over grinning and pats Sendou on the back a few times, hard.
Sakuragi: Sendou! Nyaahahaha! This is all thanks to you man! Great job!
Sendou sweatdrops, not sure what's going on.
Sendou: …What?
Sakuragi: Just as I thought that fox is getting crazier, this genius here finds out that you guys are having a fight and immediately he starts losing his focus!
Miyagi: Hanamichi.
Sendou: Having a…fight…? ._.?
Sakuragi: Thanks to that he even got scolded by Gori. Nyaahahaha! Ain’t that laughable??
Miyagi: Hanamichi! *smacks him in the head* <Don’t say that in front of Sendou!>
Sendou: Uh, wait a second. Is all that true?
Miyagi: Well… we can’t be sure but it’s pretty certain Rukawa’s been moody.
Sendou: I see… Got it. Thanks. I’m gonna go look for him now. See ya around.
He waves to everyone in the court as well before he leaves.
Miyagi: Yeah, see ya.
It actually isn’t hard to guess where Rukawa can be. Sendou has only checked out the first place he can think of and there he is, practicing alone at the usual basketball court.
Sendou: <Thank god this side of him is easy to guess.>
The court’s empty except for him this time. Sendou closes in quietly as he watches Rukawa, who hasn't felt his presence. He is almost going to call out his name, but then he decides that he should just watch him quietly like that. Rukawa continues to play by himself, entering almost every shot he makes. It's a wonder to most people how he could have had the stamina to be playing for hours and hours in a row, but Sendou understands that isn't all that odd for someone whose life revolves around the sport, himself included.
After entering a dozen or so more shots, Rukawa finally pauses for a rest and turns around to walk towards the bench when he sees Sendou. They stare at each other for a few seconds in silence until Sendou finally breaks it.
Sendou: Hey. ^_^ *waves*
Rukawa ignores him and reaches inside his bag for his water bottle.
Sendou sweatdrops: <He’s ignoring me…>
Rukawa turns his back at Sendou as he drinks from his bottle. At the same time Sendou casually walks over towards him with his hands in his pockets.
Sendou: …Am I being ignored?
Rukawa closes the cap on his bottle and glares at Sendou again. To be honest, he's got nothing to say. Sendou tilts his head a little and looks over at Rukawa again.
Sendou: Are you mad?
Rukawa stares at Sendou for a few more seconds before he picks up his basketball for another round.
Rukawa: Not really.
When Rukawa has his back turned towards Sendou again, Sendou smiles.
Sendou: <You’re lying.>
Rukawa continues to ignore him as he resumes with his practice. He knows he's slightly distracted with Sendou around but whatever. He's been gone for so long (well it feels kinda long after having met so often previously), he might as well not be there.
Sendou: *While watching Rukawa play* You don’t seem to be bringing your phone lately.
Rukawa ignores.
Sendou: I’ve been trying to call you the past few days.
Rukawa ignores.
Sendou: I don’t have your home address and number, I couldn’t contact you at all.
Rukawa goes for another shot and it enters.
Sendou pauses for a few seconds before he continues: My grandma… She died of cancer two weeks ago.
Rukawa pauses for a moment before he turns to look at Sendou, who still puts on a casual smile on his face.
Sendou: She collapsed so suddenly, my mom was worried and called me to go back home.
Rukawa now stands there listening to him.
Sendou: So I rushed home and I was lucky enough to catch her in the hospital in time, but still she died the next day. Well, to be honest I’m grateful enough that I was able to see her one last time.
Rukawa looks down at the ground, quiet. He knows he's not good with words and he ain't about to screw it.
Sendou: After that we got so busy with her funeral, I didn’t even realize it’s been two weeks. Thanks to missing practice for that long I got heavily scolded by the coach. *laughs to himself*
Rukawa almost sweat drops at the way Sendou keeps his calm as usual, but he knows that's a good trait. It's something he admires in Sendou even if he can never see himself like that. Seeing that Sendou is waiting for a response, Rukawa quietly sits on the bench with him, though at the edge.
Rukawa: …Were you close with her?
Sendou looks at Rukawa and smiles, glad that he's actually responding; he wasn't sure he would. LOL.
Sendou: Yeah… I lived with her when I was young. She was always there to support me too when I first started playing basketball.
He looks at Rukawa again to study his expressions but Rukawa remains quiet, staring at the ground.
Sendou: What about you? Do you have any grandparents?
Rukawa: No.
Sendou: Aren’t you lonely?
Rukawa: No.
Sendou: Even without me?
Rukawa goes silent again as he stares uneasily at Sendou, who only returns him with a smile. He has actually planned to piss him off by not talking to him, like it's revenge for the past two weeks of no contact. But here he is, entirely defeated. That is not part of the plan, and it quite pisses him off, only, he's not really.
Sendou: I’ve missed you these two weeks.
Rukawa: ……
Sendou: But I guess it’s my fault for forgetting my phone.
Rukawa: ……
Sendou: Oh yeah, I stopped by Shohoku before I came here looking for you. And then Sakuragi told me something interesting.
Rukawa: ……?
Sendou: He seems to be under the impression that we’re having a fight, but what does he mean when he says you’ve been losing your focus?
Rukawa: =_=#... <That moron... What the hell did he say?> It’s up to you to believe his words but I have no idea what he’s talking about.
Sendou studies Rukawa's expressions carefully. Rukawa knows and dislikes it, but he really doesn't know what Sakuragi or Sendou's talking about so he's just gonna shrug it off as usual.... until Sendou starts laughing softly.
Rukawa: =__=# … What are you laughing about?
Sendou: Well… Hahaha… It’s just, you look so serious yet at the same time it’s so adorable.
Rukawa: ……
Sendou reaches a hand out to ruffle Rukawa's hair playfully: Bring your phone next time okay? I can’t call you otherwise.
Rukawa stands up abruptly and walks over to the post to pick up his basketball, and then he throws it at Sendou who curiously looks at it in his hands.
Rukawa: I’ll beat you this time.
Sendou smiles. For some reason he kinda saw that coming. After closing his eyes and taking a deep breath for a second, he gets up and starts dribbling the ball slowly.
Sendou: Oh really. Well then, show me what you’ve got.
The two end up spending the rest of the day playing against each other. Sendou has missed that feeling so much it now feels nostalgic. It feels good to see Rukawa again, to see him standing there in front of him, always trying his best to beat him. Most of all, he misses just being with him. He has to admit, it was slightly awkward for a while, especially since what happened that day. It had taken him so much courage to do it, yet it took him even more courage to stop it. He’s realized that he treasures Rukawa more than anything, and he’s not about to let a moment’s temptation ruin it all. He wishes to could express it somehow. He hopes he could convey it to Rukawa some day. But it’s not that day, not yet. To be honest he doesn’t even know if that day will ever come. Maybe things can get complicated. Maybe he may just realize that it’s better to stay this way. But until that happens, he decides that he wants to keep what he has at the moment, this bond that he shares with Rukawa that no one else has.
Rukawa's pissed to have lost to Sendou by two shots, again. It’s not fair that he’s driven himself so hard the past fourteen days, only to still be beaten by the man with a two-week blank. He’s annoyed at himself, annoyed for still being unable to defeat Sendou, annoyed for realizing how different Sendou is to him than everyone else. Sometimes he even thinks to himself about how much easier it would have been for him if he had just never realized. But reality is that he has... and that is something he’ll have to learn to accept... eventually.
Sendou can see the frustration in Rukawa’s eyes from his 14th defeat. He knows he shouldn’t be laughing or smiling, but he can’t help it. He’s glad to know that they’re back to normal. He’s glad to know that he's been forgiven even without words.
-----------------------------------
One Saturday just as Shohoku's practice session ends, the first year students are picking up the balls and clearing the gym when Ayako hears Miyagi sighing as he walks past her.
Ayako: Oh? What’s wrong, Ryouta?
Miyagi perks up a little when he hears her: Ah, Aya chan.
Ayako: You don’t look good.
Miyagi looks at her for a second before he sighs again: The atmosphere
gets heavy each time that period comes around.
Ayako:
What period? ._.;
Miyagi: Isn’t it mid year exams next week?
Ayako: Oh, that. ^^; --> What the hell was she thinking? XD
Hearing the two talk, Sakuragi starts watching them closely as he continues to mop the floor. Deep inside he knows that there's nothing between the two of them, but somehow he still can't help but to be wary. Miyagi doesn't like that, he knows, and that's why he's trying his best already not to be cutting into their conversation at this moment. But that sure doesn't stop him from glaring at them with narrowed eyes and pouted lips.
Ayako glares at Miyagi a little: Don’t tell me you haven’t been studying?
Miyagi sweatdrops: Well… About that…
Ayako sighs and lightly hits Miyagi's head with her harisen (paper fan): Do you really want to enter the fail squad again? You know you can’t go to the nationals if you fail, right?
Sakuragi gasps in shock as he witnesses the intolerable scene and drops his mop immediately before he runs towards them shouting.
Sakuragi: A-A-A-Ayako san!! How can you hit Ryouchin!? >_<!
Ayako: Well I know I’m right. And you’re no different too so you better watch out.
Then, Ayako turns around to face everyone else before she continues.
Ayako: The four of you fail squad people! Listen up!
Rukawa and Mitsui flinch on the other side of the court.
Ayako: You CANNOT afford to fail next week’s exams, got it? If you fail…
The four problematic kids continue to stare at Ayako, anticipating what's to come.
Ayako: Don’t think about seeing your loved one again. *a sparkle appears to the side of her eye*
Sakuragi: @_@!!
Miyagi: .__.
Mitsui: >_>;
Rukawa: -_-
Everyone else sweatdrops.
(Note: In case you can’t tell, Miyagi’s reaction is the smallest cos’ he’s wondering how Ayako’s threat can ever apply to him and Sakuragi. And Sakuragi’s got the biggest reaction cos’ he’s an idiot and he doesn’t realize the same.)
Ayako: Hanamichi! You’re the worst of them all, so Ryouta! You’d better help him with his studies.
Miyagi: Eeh… Why me…
Rukawa sighs to himself. He has almost forgotten about exams next week. Well actually, he did forget, but let's not get into that. He knows he hasn't been studying all that hard, especially when he'd rather spend all that time on basketball than to waste it on some mathematics studies and crap that isn't going to practically get him anywhere in the future. But he should be okay, he thinks. He did fine the last time the four of them had a study session at gorilla's... uh he means Akagi senpai's place. It's not like studying is that hard. What's hard for him is trying not to fall asleep while at it. He is about to leave the court for the locker room when Ayako reminds him.
Ayako: Rukawa, you be careful not to fail too alright? I don’t want to imagine what’ll happen in the nationals without our ace.
Rukawa: …I know.
And so Rukawa walks home after he finishes packing up; he has taken the bus to school today after waking up two hours late for school. As he walks, he thinks about how he's going to last a few hours of studies that night. Well, a few hours would be way too optimistic; he doubts he'd even last an hour. While waiting for the green light at a junction, he stares blankly at the ground across the street, his mind clear of thoughts until a few seconds later when he remembers something.
He pulls his sling back around and reaches in for his phone. Sendou hasn't messaged him, and that probably means that they're not going for outside practice today. He continues to stare at the phone screen until someone pushes him from behind.
Passerby: You’re blocking the way. Move it!
The green light is on and everyone walks by him impatiently. Thanks to the push from that bloody stranger, Rukawa drops the phone onto the ground. He frowns at the asshole and is tempted to return him an eye when he decides that it's more important to save the phone first. After crossing the road, he stops to check and see if it may be broken, but luckily it didn't. Sighing to himself, he continues to walk home with the phone in his hand, cursing to himself why he didn't just ride his bike to school this morning since he's already late and there's nothing he can do about it.
He sighs even more when he remembers that there's studying to do. He admires Akagi for being able to cope so well with basketball and studies at the same time. Sometimes he wonders how that's even possible considering how little time there is to spare for the other if you try to concentrate on one. After thinking to himself for a few more moments, he flips his phone open to dial a number.
Sendou has just finished practice over on his side and is walking home alone whistling to himself when he hears his phone ring.
Sendou: <Someone called? Must be Hikoichi.> *picks up the phone without checking the called ID* Hello?
Rukawa: Can I go over to your place tonight?
Sendou stops walking for a moment, stunned: …Huh?
He then checks the phone's called ID and his eyes go wide at the name that shows on it.
Sendou: Eeh?? Rukawa??
Rukawa: Why are you so surprised?
Sendou: Oh, no… it’s just, this is the first time you’ve called me directly…
Rukawa: ……
Sendou: ^^; Sorry, you were saying…?
Rukawa: …… *wonders if he should ask again*
Sendou: …Rukawa?
Rukawa: I’m thinking of studying over at your place tonight.
Sendou: My…place?
Rukawa: Forget it if it’s inconvenient.
Sendou: Oh no, I’m fine with that. Anytime.
Rukawa: …I’ll go over at six then.
Sendou: Yeah, okay.
Rukawa hangs up, and Sendou continues to stare at his phone. Well that's a surprise. A pleasant one in fact. Wondering what the reason could have been, Sendou smiles to himself as he resumes walking home.
A few hours later...
Sendou: *opens the door and smiles* Welcome home. ^_^
Rukawa: -_-;…
Sendou laughs and lets the boy in: Sorry, I just wanted to say it.
Rukawa rolls his eyes and enters the apartment, taking off his shoes as Sendou closes the door behind them.
Sendou: To be honest I’m surprised. I’ve never imagined you to study at my place.
Rukawa: …If it bothers you that much I’ll leave.
Sendou: Eh? I didn’t say anything.
Rukawa: ……
Sendou: ^^; ……
Then, Rukawa sits on the floor and puts his bag in front of him pulling a few textbooks out. Sendou watches curiously until he remembers something.
Sendou: Um… I forgot to mention this just now but I don’t exactly have a table.
Rukawa: The floor will do.
Sendou: ^^; You sure?
Rukawa: I’m asking you for help so I’m not exactly in any position to complain.
Sendou: Asking me for help…? Why so sudden?
Rukawa: …I can’t afford to waste my dream before even going to the nationals.
Sendou: ^^; I see.
Rukawa looks through his textbooks: Which one are you better at? English or history?
Sendou: ^^;; ……
And so the two of them end up studying on the bed with the books on top as they sit right by the edge (it's a frameless bed, just two mattresses piled together and stuck against a corner). Sendou has got exams next week too but only later in the week. He has planned to study only early next week but since Rukawa's here, he may as well study along with him.
Right before he begins he's asked Rukawa what makes him want to study at his place. Rukawa casually answers that having someone else with him may just help him stay awake a little longer. But well oh well, that so totally does not seem to work, for he's now fallen asleep on the bed right after about three hours. But hey, mind you, three hours is a great deal of improvement as far as Rukawa's concerned.
Sendou quietly laughs to himself when he sees Rukawa bury his face under an arm. He wonders if he should wake him up but scratches the idea when he remembers what he's heard Rukawa's capable of if disturbed during his sleep.
Sendou: <I guess it’s better to let him sleep.>
Slowly, he gets up and quietly moves the textbooks away from the bed. Once it’s clear, Sendou takes a deep breath and bends over to carry Rukawa up as slowly as possible. After all, he can't possibly let him sleep that way till morning. Carefully, he carries him up onto the bed and puts him down, making sure that his head lands on the pillow. He aware he's a tad nervous, but at least he's not guilty. He knows he won't do anything cowardly like he almost did before.
After putting him down, he continues to stare deep and long at Rukawa's sleeping face. He's still as beautiful as ever. No, he's even more beautiful today. As far as Sendou's concerned Rukawa only gets more and more beautiful each day, just like the way his heart longs more and more for him. But he knows how to suppress that now. He knows how to keep things the way they are, the way they should be. He's contented with the relationship he currently has with him, he won't dare ask for more.
Sighing, Sendou turns around to put the books away nicely when he feels a tug on his shirt. He looks down to see a hand, Rukawa's hand. He’s staring at him with his head turned towards Sendou, his expression blank as usual.
Sendou: …Rukawa?
Rukawa: …Where’re you going to sleep if I’m sleeping here?
Sendou looks away and thinks for a moment: I’ll be fine by the side.
Rukawa: ……
Sendou: Well, it’s not exactly nice to let my guest sleep on the floor is it?
Rukawa stares at him for a moment: We can share the bed.
Sendou's eyes widen a little at Rukawa's suggestion. Really, no one could have expected that.
Sendou: Isn’t it a little too small…
He is about to protest but he eventually sweatdrops and gives in after getting glared at.
Sendou: ^^; Alright. But I’ll sleep later so you go ahead and—
Rukawa interrupts: I’ll hog the bed automatically if you sleep later.
Sendou: …… ._.;
In the end, Sendou quite has no choice but to join him in sleep at the same time. He has to admit, it is awkward. And worst of all, it's making him nervous. It's strange why Rukawa would insist on such a thing. Is he just being childish? Or is he just trying to cover up his want to sleep on the bed without being too in-your-face? It's only nine plus at the moment and Sendou doesn't even usually sleep until midnight. But now he's certain that he won't be able to sleep at all tonight. Though at least, it's good news for him that Rukawa falls asleep quick. And this time, he's really asleep.
---------------
The next morning, 7am, Sendou wakes up... only to find Rukawa overlapping him in his sleep. He stiffens up immediately, his heart pounding. Rukawa has his head over Sendou's left arm, his right hand over his stomach. What the hell is this? Sendou can't even begin to think.
Rukawa's still asleep; his breathing is normal. But over here Sendou's having a hard time trying to even keep his heart at a pace that’s safe from heart attack. If it races any faster, even Rukawa may just wake up from it. Sendou looks to his side to see Rukawa still sleeping peacefully. He gulps to himself, wondering what he can do, what he should do. He carefully studies their situation once more when he realizes that he can't feel his left arm.
Sendou: <My arm’s numb…>
He tries to move the fingers on that hand; they can hardly move. He sweatdrops to himself and tries to breath normally, figuring that this is what Rukawa means by “his body tends to automatically hog the bed”.
Sendou breathes in: <…Relax… What I need to do now is to move him away from my arm.>
And so slowly, Sendou moves his right hand over Rukawa's head and very carefully tries to shift him away from his arm. What are the chances that he won't wake up from this? Who knows. He can only pray that he's a deep sleeper. Sendou gently slips his hand under Rukawa's head from the back and slowly moves him away... and it is a success. Sendou heaves a sigh of relief and lets go of Rukawa's head when that very hand hits Rukawa's hand that's lying against his own stomach while he's pulling it back. And Rukawa wakes up. (D’oh!)
Sendou freezes on the spot when Rukawa half opens his eyes. He wants to quickly get off the bed but his numbed arm isn't helping. Rukawa wakes up to see Sendou's face close to him, and he blankly stares at him like he has no idea what's going on until it eventually clicks. Abruptly, he gets up on the bed and looks back down at Sendou who seems to be anticipating some sort of reaction.
A yawn comes out of his mouth first, however, and then he looks at Sendou again to say.
Rukawa: Sorry. I can’t control myself once I fall asleep.
Sendou: …Don’t worry about it. I kinda figured.
And then Sendou gets up as well, his arm getting slightly better now that the weight is off. He sits on the edge of the bed waiting for the numbness to clear completely while Rukawa borrows the bathroom. In that time, Sendou looks down at his arm, his hand, and then his palm. He tries to move his fingers again and succeeds a little. At the same time, he can’t help but think to himself. How does Rukawa manage to keep a cool face like that? How is he able to act like it’s no big deal, like it’s really just an accident, not that he thinks he did it on purpose. Of course, he knows why. He always has. The answer is simple if he would just stop hoping for the unlikely.
Rukawa isn’t the one who seeks something more than friendship.
A few minutes later, Rukawa gets out of the bathroom, all ready and prepared for practice.
Rukawa: I’m leaving first. I’ll be back later. I’ve still got more to study for.
Sendou: Oh, okay. See ya.
Rukawa steps out of the apartment as Sendou watches him leave from where he is.